Listen to my words

New blog address

2006-09-17T12:57:00.000+02:00

And thus the move to another blog system has been completed. In the future I will blog att http://www.squishythoughts.com - where squishyness comes first. See you there.

Everybody! Wave... now!

2006-08-18T21:44:00.000+02:00

I've been doing a lot of thing that is not blogging recently. I've been learning to model humans in Blender. I've been writing and I've been programming. I should've blogged about all that stuff, but I haven't since I felt my blog would become polluted with... me. Too much of me. Therefor I'm planning to transfer this blog to a wordpress based version where I have something to organize the me's: tags.

I will also move the blog to my own server again, so I can have more control over all the stuff that's running on it. I want to try to do some nifty stuff with python and just maybe possibly lisp. These are new languages that I've never worked in before and it has taken some time getting used to how free you are in those languages compared to C++.

The new place will not be just a blog, but kind of a different beast, I think. I might possibly put up some non-bloggificious stuff about things that I think are interesting. I'll pipe my horn when the move has been completed.

Writing is really quite stimulating...

Dirty, so dirty...

2006-06-26T03:25:00.000+02:00

Yes, I've done it again. I've been playing with myself... games, that is. Being an incredibly smart, and let's not forget most handsome, young man, I have come to find simple games to be too... eh, simple. Yes, way too simple for a refined mind such as my own. One game that is not difficult enough is Rubik's Cube. I mean you only need 29 simple turns and you've solved it. Pah! I say. Bring on the Magic Cube 4D. Now, that's a real challenge... for anyone with an IQ of 170+. Why the hell would you want a 4-dimensional cube? I have problems getting my head around six sides of those pesky little cubes (which I bet would be no match to pry loose with a screwdriver), and if you follow the link and click on the picture at the top of their page, you get to try it out. You can just feel neuron's breaking down in tears and committing collective suicide from the complexity of that thing.

I haven't played it, looking at it was quite enough for me. I did play a little Vulture's Eye though, a graphical NetHack-version. Another game which makes your braincells try to emigrate is Tong. It's as simple as it's devious. A combination of Tetris -- the classical falling-blocks game -- and Pong -- the classical hit-ball-with-a-board... game, eh, yeah -- and you are supposed to play them at the same time. The ball is bouncing inside the Tetris playing field and you have to control both games, simultaneously. It's kinda like constructing a 30-story skyscraper while giving your girlfriend a full body massage (and I'm talking the whole thing: massage oil, Barry White, the muppets, live candles). So, if you're up for some mind fucking, you should give Tong a go... and that sounded a lot less wrong in my head.

Anyways, those are my current gaming adventures. You know what that means? It means I'm still procrastinating... shit.

Time is a'wastin'

2006-06-24T04:56:00.000+02:00

When I installed linux, I figured I shouldn't install any games. The silly rabbit knows I've played the Windows games way more than I should have, and if they're not installed, it's a lot easier to resist the urge. Those easy and quick to play games are a real and very potent problem, office workers all around the world spend countless hours playing WinMine and Solitaire. They're really devious; you have to use your brain just enough to not feel like you're watching TV, but not enough to actually get smarter (it's quite possible it'll actually make you dumber). Now, contrary to my own words of wisdom, I couldn't resist the urge and installed a game tonight. It's called Neverball (featuring Neverputt). It's similar to Super Monkey Ball for the GameCube (and Dreamcast?) which means it's very addictive. Yes, addictive, just like drugs, coffee and lubricated horseshoes. I ended up wasting my whole evening playing that damn game instead of writing. Is procrastination rearing it's reluctant head? Hell yeah! When I'm procrastinating I always end up looking for games. I've also spent a fair share of time tonight, reading about OpenTTD (Open Transport Tycoon Deluxe), FreeCiv and FreeCol. Lucky for me, I managed to resist installing them, else I wouldn't be blogging right now (god damnit! I just used "blog" as a verb, another step towards the dark, smelly, evil abyss of quite possibly eternal fruitcake).

Procrastination is a real bitch. But I also think trying to write a script which doesn't contain any fantasy elements makes it a bit more difficult for me, because reality is boring... or dumb... or possibly both: dorumb.

While I'm on the subject, I should mention this link: Supposing... Computers are deliberately wasting our time which is a fitting article for this evening of wasted work. So long, and thanks for the fruitcake... I mean fish.

George Lucas in Love

2006-06-19T01:10:00.000+02:00

I happened to find this while surfing about recently: George Lucas in Love which is a Shakespeare in Love-spoof but we're back at the school years of George Lucas and we get to see where the inspiration for StarWars really came from. Great fun and well produced.

I've also just now (about an hour ago) finished watching Point Pleasant which was axed by Fox (meaning they applied cheap deodorant) after 13 episodes. And what can I say, I loved the show. Sometimes it gets just a tad bit too heavy on the melodrama (don't get me wrong, I like melodrama, but in a few spots, they overdid it) but other than that it's just great. I was literally jumping in my seat while I was watching the finale. Too bad they cut it short (deodorant is good for you -- one of life's lessons).

Now I go all techno-geek on you!

2006-04-21T12:15:00.000+02:00

A few years ago I tried migrating to linux but I never felt I could do all the stuff I used to do in Windows. I ran multiboot and after a while I realized I didn't boot up in linux all that much, so away it went into the dark corners of my mind. I killed the linux partition because I never used it.

A couple of weeks ago I thought I got the idea to try again. I have a server which has been running slackware for years, but I wanted to see if linux was desktop-ready. Could I replace Windows (which I use everyday for all kinds of things) with linux without being frustrated or feeling restricted? I looked around at the different distributions and settled with Gentoo. Click forward a few times and here we are. 12.5% of my computer is now running linux and I'm not the least bit frustrated (not counting non-computer related frustration). The game support is a bit flakey (using Wine) but they're busy trying to map d3d to opengl, so I'm hopeful, other than that it's really nice. I kind of like the idea of having source code available for most of the software I run, even though I'll probably never tamper with any of it. I haven't booted up Windows in over a week. This is also one of the reasons why I haven't written here for a while, been busy getting my machine working for me instead of against me (I do not condone torture and I only do it for fun) and now it finally is.

I've been thinking about getting a PDA. I've read people can reach close to 80 wpm on one of those using the Fitaly-layout. The question is, do I need one? I bought a laptop a few years ago to, among other things, become a bit more mobile. The thing with laptops is that they weigh a couple of kilos and they're really hard to fit into your pants... ehh.. pocket. You really shouldn't put your laptop in your pants, that would be wrong. I plan on using it for writing, but I don't know if that's a feasible idea? Will writing on one of those give me carpal tunnel syndrome or give me hairy palms? Could it give me the ability to write wherever I am? I hope so...

Truck!

Fangs and blood

2006-04-18T18:40:00.000+02:00

I have never actually seen a vampire. Oh, I have seen Interview with a Vampire and BtVS but I've never actually seen a real, living (dead?) vampire. The reason for this is because there are no such thing as vampires -- or so I thought. Then something hit me... all of those stories can't be fiction, can they? I mean, the vampire myth goes way back (I don't think they called them vampires back then) so there must be some truth to it.

This of course led me to the movies. Whenever there are vampires in movies, there's usually a vampire hunter. From Dr. Abraham van Helsing to Blade and Buffy. How come there is always a vampire hunter around when vampires roam? "They're just movies", right? Possibly, but I think there is something more to it. I think if you want to see a vampire, you have to actually hunt it. Vampires don't like attention (with the exception of Lestat from the movie Queen of the Damned, but let's not talk about wanna-be-goth vampires) and a vampire hunter casts too much light on them (and in Blade's case, UV-light) which means they have to destroy him or her.

So my conclusion is this: if you want to see a vampire you're gonna have to become a vampire hunter (or slayer if you're a girl and have super powers) and except for putting out an ad in the paper, buying a cool trenchcoat (brown cloth or black leather, depending on the era you want to represent) and getting yourself a silver cross (it should be silver in case you run into a werewolf, then you can stab it to death, or so I've heard) you should also get yourself one of these: a Vampire-slaying kit.

So, time to go out and hunt, and if you still don't find any vampires, you can get your girlfriend or boyfriend to act the hunter and you'll pretend to be the vampire: The forbidden love.

"A vampire in love with a slayer. Poetic, in a maudlin sort of way."

Ben Reeper: Chapter 2

2006-03-08T01:20:00.000+01:00

Ladies and gents, birds and poltergeists, singers and post-traumatic pants disorders. I'm here to tell you that chapter 2 of the Ben Reeper saga is now online for your reading pleasure, or if reading is not your pleasure you're welcome to rent a movie instead.

Last time Ben Reeper and his crew found out that a race known as the Velusans are building planetbusters, a powerful and illegal weapon, capable of destroying an entire world. They were assigned the task of verifying that information, and if they are building planetbusters they must stop them before these weapons end up in the wrong hands.

I would also like to note that I've moved from deviantart.com to blogger.com because of the RichEdit capabilities of blogger.com. It makes my life a lot easier, and it makes me look young and hip. A lot more hip. There is no such thing as too hip. And if you add some hop, throw in a pants disorder (preferebly not a post-traumatic one, then you'll end up with Kris Kross), and you have a winning concept.

The new link is http://benreeper.blogspot.com and chapter 2 can be found here.

Is it possible to tell from this entry, how tired am I right now? Nah, didn't think so. But I am tired, just look at how wiggly my letters are. No? Okay, fine. Be that way. Don't listen to the almighty cheese. I can dance across your lap in the time it takes for you to say "Gandolfino" wearing a fishbowl as a hat. You think you're funny, huh? You in a red car, licking the asphalt like there's no food in the refrigerator! What am I saying? And why is that refrigerator moving? Are they supposed to move? Maybe it's a new model, with wheels or something. Comes with the apartment I guess... wait a minute, who's apartment is this? I don't live in an apartment! Where am I? Could this be Australia? I thought I'd gotten out of that place months ago. Well, I have to go see if I can find some weird people, or perhaps a bed... or maybe both? Or a map... a nap would be good. And a bed. Well...

So long... and take that damn violin and the guy attached to it with you when you leave!

A misunderstanding

2006-02-17T18:49:00.000+01:00

Based on the comments on my last entry, I suspect I have not been clear. I have, under no circumstance, said that TV stands for Terrific Voluptuousness. It is just wrong of you to think that, because I know you do (you naughty bastards). The reason I enjoy watching Veronica Mars (the TV-show) is its good writing. It keeps feeding me and fooling me with plot-twists and good characters.

I'm still confused how Elizabeth Shirley-- eh, Hurley, fits into all this. She's never been in Veronica Mars, hell, she's not even a fan of Veronica Mars (She claims to not have watched television since 1979, so there is no way she is fan). Hmm.. but it could be... yeah, I maybe see the connection now. She co-starred in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me which also stars Seth Green. Seth Green has in turn stared in Buffy: The Vampire Slayer. And of course the creator of that show, Joss Whedon, starred in episode 6 of Veronica Mars during season 2. It all makes sense now, but I gotta tell you, you have one twisted way of making connections dude. I mean all those steps just so you could drool over Elizabeth "Don't call me Shirley!" Hurley.

Unlike you people, I do not, under most circumstances drool at all while watching TV of any kind (maybe except for Survivor, but that drooling is because my brain has stopped working and thus the muscles in my jaw are not given instructions to make me not look like an idiot).
Instead of drooling, I flap my ears. Like Dumbo, but without the elephantness.

I really think you guys need to lay back on the ogling and pay more attention to the story. Remember:

Story. Is. Everything.

And besides, Jennifer Love Hewitt is much prettier ;)

Another boat hits the ground sinking

2006-02-01T14:05:00.000+01:00

I have received letter after letter from devoted fans asking me to continue my bodypart foray. They've said things like "I've never learned this much... ever!" and "You are intelligent and good looking and I wish I could be just like you." and "Is it possible to buy plush dolls of you? I want to have one on my computer screen so you're always with me."

Then I woke up. But if there is an actual demand for plush toys of me, I'll see what I can do (join my fanclub). It's been a while since I've written anything, and that's because I'm writing but I'm not writing it here. Or, I'm supposed to be writing but I've been rewatching Veronica Mars season one for the last few days. I've also had like... at LEAST four classes... in like... three weeks? =)

It's apparent that I'm suffering from missing time syndrome. So I've either gone through a rift in time while driving my car or I've been abducted by aliens (maybe also while driving my car). Or, it could be that I was abducted by aliens while inside the time rift... which means there could be more than one of me! Have you seen me and I seemed not to be myself? In that case, call me... the me that you didn't see that is...

I've been having one of my delusions of grandeur when I think: "I can model my own 3D world!". Well, I can't do that because a world is kind of... big. Anyway, I've been fiddeling with that for some time until I came out of my delusional state. It's feels good to know I don't have to make my own world when I already own this one. Very comforting, with my own servants and all.

Other than that I've been writing on chapter two of Ben Reeper's epic tale of racoons and a sinking Titanic. I've also been thinking about a short-movie synopsis I have to turn in soon for one of the courses I'm taking -- it's turning out to be quite a ride.

Where the hell is the servant who I sent for grape juice? Being ruler of the world is quite a chore, I can tell you that. Anyway, I have to go check up on my plush doll manifacturing plant I ordered a few days ago.

By the way: Veronica Mars rocks my... brain lobes.

Ben Reeper: Chapter 1

2006-01-16T23:49:00.000+01:00

I've finished writing chapter one of the epic Ben Reeper Saga. It will be epic and it will be saga... stic. Ben Reeper is a classical old school space hero. He works as a secret agent for the GalacticUnion. Ben Reeper and his friends are sent to where they are most needed. They're like the A-team if you take away everybody except Mr. T. Hmm... maybe that wasn't the best possible way to describe this story. Let me try that again...

It's an adventure tale in space. It's about self discovery, friendship, love, hate, trust, betrayal and most of all, it's about trying to be as entertaining as possible (notice the "trying") while being about all those things. I hope you read it and I hope you have opinions and I hope you bash-- ehrm.. tell me what you think.

I will hopefully write on this story for quite some time (I have a very long plot figured out and right now I feel all tingly... but that could be the electrodes I have attached to my nipples.)

I have put the Ben Reeper story over here. On that page, I also explain why I chose deviantart.com for this. I might move it later on, if the devious one will prove to be too difficult for me handle ;)

Live long and prosper... or as Ben Reeper would say: "Life rocks!"

Edit: I have indeed moved the Ben Reeper story from deviantart.com to blogger.com due to RichText formatting. You can find the story here.

Body part 1: The head

2006-01-07T04:24:00.000+01:00

Tonight I came up with this great idea about blogging subjects. I have, now and then, said that I have problems coming up with something to write here, therefore I came up with a kind of blog-series. In it, I will write about one body part per entry. By doing this I hope you will all learn new great things about the wonderful machine that is your body. I shall start with the head.

The head is a hairy piece of equipment (at least in my case, some heads are shaved) and contains lots and lots of useful things. Among other things it takes care of helping you remember your phone number; why you shouldn't dance without clothes, in the street outside your house and who the creepy persons in your livingroom really are. It is also the caretaker of making you confused when your socks smell of cinnamon or when you suddenly realize, the person next to you is actually the your long lost twin.

When you are in jail for dancing naked outside while calling yourself on your mobile, with your family standing by the window, watching in despair, the head helps you figure out what you did wrong i.e. wearing your super-man costume on your friends wedding was a mistake.

Sometimes heads are full of all kinds of things which needs to be let out. One way of doing this is to use an electrical drill, but that will probably hurt (depending on the particular skull in question) and it is quite messy.

Another method is talking about random things with a friend, sometimes that will let the things that don't fit in there get out through your mouth. This is accompanied by having your foot in your mouth. It requires great athletic abilities and good flexibility, which limits the use of this method to a selected few.

The last method I have to offer is to write it all in a blog using a special pseudo-writing technique that I, myself, have no knowledge of -- whatsoever. I have never heard of that method and I would most certainly not, use it. Absolutely not. I do not endorse it in any way! In fact, forget I ever mentioned it.

The head also have a number of useful holes that I couldn't even begin to describe. But I'm sure you have figured out their purposes by now, if not, I will leave that as an exercise for the reader (use your imagination, the possibilities are endless).

I am now thinking that writing about body parts might have been a mistake. Educating the masses should best be left to the experts. Besides, I don't think I can handle the responsibility. But I want you to note that I have added a new link to the Links list on the left... no, the other left. It's a friend's blog which might be worth looking at, reading, comtemplating, getting angry at and then begin stalking said friend with intent on singing at him. Remember, the more the choirer.

That is all for this night. As soon as I get out of jail I will be singing to you in my cinnamon smelling socks. No, bawling in my smelly super-man socks.

A message from the other side

2006-01-05T03:48:00.000+01:00

Here I am, on the other side. It's dark here. And hot. Very hot. And there's a guy with a pitchfork. Or there would be a guy with a pitchfork if I lived on a farm. If I did, I would probably get up in a few hours to milk the pigs and paint the cows.

But this isn't a farm, this is the other side! I am of course not dead and haunting my own blog (creepy AND geeky), I am talking about this new and better year. Last year was good, I give you that, but it's nothing compared to this year. This year still has that new-car smell.

But why is this year so much better? Well, this is the year aliens will visit earth, which means the market for earth souvenirs will bloom (which is good, since then I would finally get rid of all these boxes of nosespray I bought off ebay). A breakthrough in time travel will make it possible to go back in time and tell yourself not to get that haircut and give yourself the winning lotto lines (you get to split the wins with millions of others, yay!). Things will get even crazier when angry llamas strike back at northern France and parts of Denmark. And the best thing: Ben Reeper will finally have his story told.

You're thinking, "Who's Ben Reeper and if there's a story to tell, why haven't I already heard it?" I'll tell you why, because I haven't written it yet! If you have checked the info thingy here on Blogger.com about me (you are always welcome to join my fanclub) it says I'm interested in programming. A few years ago I decided to make a simple 3D-game where you run around and blow stuff up. It proved to be quite a lot more complicated than planned and after over a year of work, I realized I hadn't even gotten halfway through. I needed more people. And being the people person I am, I shelved the project.

The game did have a very basic storyline about a space hero, flying around the void looking for people to help, quite clichéd and perfect for a simple shooting game. The hero's name was Ben Reeper. The funny thing is, even though I haven't touched that project for over a year, the character Ben Reeper has been with me ever since. In retrospect, I think coming up with that character was the most fun I had with that project.

Anyway, since then the story has evolved and has become something I really feel like writing about. This is why this year, with it's new-car smell, I will try my best to give the story the time and energy it deserves. When men are out milking their pigs, I will sit here and write. I'm thinking of putting it up on a blog. I'll announce that here when the first chapter is done.

Now, covering my ass in sheer panic, I will excuse myself in advance. The story will be written in prose, in english. Since english is not my native language I will stand in a corner, screaming for help (silently, so that I don't give away my position) when the grammatical errors come looking for me, armed with pitchforks and torches. Seriously though, I will try my very best to keep it as grammatically correct as I possibly can, and I hope I succeed in that without sacrificing quality or a goat.

That is all for this time. Thank you for reading, I am grateful as always (join my fanclub!). Paint your cows and we'll see each other soon (that line doesn't really work in a blog, does it?).

Ben Reeper is watching...

In writing, no one can hear you scream

2005-12-15T21:59:00.000+01:00

I have found a fatal flaw in my online ramblings. I named this blog "Listen to my words" but that's impossible! You can't listen to my words because I'm not there. You see? Because if I was there we would be having a two-way conversation, you asking who I am, what I'm doing there and saying that you want me out of your house. But I'm not there -- and by the way, you're rude -- so you will have to read my words. Or maybe you could use some kind of speech synthesization software, so your computer will read my blog out loud like a retarded Hal9000.

Can I really continue writing after this? It feels like the world has been pulled from underneath my feet and I'm now in Australia. What does it say about my integrity, my honesty, if I continue writing under this... this facade? Will anyone listen... I mean read anything that I write when they can't even trust the title? And will I make myself understood, here in austrlia?

Damn it all to hell! I will continue to write here! I don't care about faulty titles or towers. This is quite meaningless, isn't it? I mean, this blog post is about something very irrelevant -- irrelevantism, the next big thing?

I have a screenplay to write! Why am I sitting here filling this page with nonsense? I promise the next entry to be a lot more meaningful, I heard that really goes well with the folk over here down under.

A world full of botox injections.and starving children

2005-12-11T16:49:00.000+01:00

Look! It's all different! It's all new! It's... it's... a bit scary? Don't worry, I've just given my blog a facelift. It's still full of the same meaningless nonsense that is my life. I just thought I'd tell you so that all you devoted readers don't run away screaming in shear terror. Best wishes to you all, I wish you all lots of backrubs and sexy christmas commercials... and that was a sneak peak of my Oscar acceptance speech. And with a speech like that I deserve an Oscar! Don't you think?

Harold Pinter held a sharp speech when receiving his Nobel litterature award. It's about writing and his thoughts of the world, and he says it through a very articulate web of black humor, sincerity and devastating facts . What he says in his speech is nothing new, but he says it in a way that makes you care. He is angry at the world. He is angry at the way people treat each other and at the contstant quest for power which leaves a trail of death and suffering in it's wake. Check it out if you get the chance (it's on piratebay.org if you're into the torrents). It's worth the download.

Blue Velvet, The Hours and the U.N.

2005-12-06T00:02:00.000+01:00

I've been wanting to see The Hours and Blue Velvet (Yay, Lynch!) for a while now and last week I finally saw them. First off, Blue Velvet. Isabella Rossellini proved she's not that good a singer. Kyle MacLachlan was naive and a little weird (as always). And Lynch's trademark mood oozed through the whole film. I actually found parts of the movie funny. I'm not sure if it's meant to be a comedy, but it felt like David Lynch's typically sick humor. I love the intro and outro sequences where you see white pickets fences and a firetruck driving by with a fireman waving to the camera, to us.

Also, what's the fuzz about Dennis Hopper as Frank Booth being creepy? Sure, you wouldn't want to have him as a neighbour because he seemed extremly volatile, but I didn't find him that creepy. I guess it depends on the viewer.

The second movie of the week is The Hours. This movie used a badass structure. It's three stories, about fifty years apart, all shown at the same time. There's some smooth editing in action here. You could actually recognize when they changed time period within a few seconds, but they used every trick in the book to achive that (except for color timing, which was for the better). Unfortunately there was one thing about the editing that bothered me. Sometimes the movie went for a reaction shot when there was no use for it. It felt as if the editor was having trouble relaxing in the slower scenes. And the movie never takes a break and lingers on a shot, which I think could've been used to great effect here.

The movie itself is excellent, and it has quite a deep message to the viewer. I do think some people will find this movie boring, since it deals with depression and the meaning of life :)

On a different note, did you know that in 1999, the U.N suggested a tax for emails?

See Shades of Gray

2005-11-27T04:44:00.000+01:00

Just gonna mention this movie I found. I was supposed to come up with an outline for the proper application of crazy glue to moving pictures, and instead I ended up watching Shades of Gray which is an independent shoestring-budget movie. If you liked Star Wreck you would probably like this one as well. It's not a sci-fi movie and it doesn't reference other works, it's just a good old funny movie. Good characters, good acting and quick paced. And if you look at the timestamp on this blog entry, you should be able to guess exactly how many viciously hairy imps that are having a party in my head right now. If I should claim the earth to be flat, that just means they've knocked out the part that... refers to... what was I going to say? Yes, they might mess it up for me so that I'll say something crazy, like that birds can fly or something.

That was all for tonight, I hope to see you again soon (yes, I can see you).

Wideness and goblins

2005-11-22T00:12:00.000+01:00

I'd like one of these. Or maybe not, 'cause I'd have to rebuild the room to make that thing fit ;)

Ah, and now my Harry Potter-report. It appears I have confused the name of the movie. It's not Harry Potter and the gobbled fire as I said yesterday. How silly of me. The movie is actually called Harry Potter and the firing of the goblins. And the symbolism is amazing in this movie, although it took me a while for me to figure it all out. First you have Harry, who symbolizes the goblin(s), since he's short. And then you have Walmart who symbolizes the person doing the firing, i.e your boss. And since Harry is a low-income employee at Walmart, his life is in constant danger of layoffs and cheap sales.

I liked this installment as well as the two others I've seen. I will see number two in a day or so and then I can check off another box in my "Things to do before taking over the world"-booklet.

And now I think I'm going to see an episode of Andromeda. It doesn't have the Whedonesque quality I'm always on the lookout for, but when this show is good, it shines!

Swimming!

2005-11-20T14:07:00.000+01:00

I have this great idea. What if, instead of writing a school assignment, I'll write some nonsense here to give myself even less time to finish? Nothing beats swimming around in procrastination.

Anyway, I began writing a blog entry a few days ago about how super heroes (superman, spider-man, wobbly-man -- next from Marvel? we can only hope) often are self-sacrificing while the super villains are egotistical. It didn't turn out the way I planned (I wanted more than two barely correct sentences) so I scrapped it. But since I'm swimming, I thought this would be an excellent time to pick up the pen of one of the greatest playwriters this side of the stone-age and go crazy with iambic pentameter... Shakespeare didn't write that many comic books, did he?

I think I got sidetracked... Where was I? Oh, yes, I was talking about not talking about super heroes. Lately I've been having problems with a certain dislike for what I write. I edited down this entry to about half (and you'll never know what you missed). Something akin to writers block, but more of a writers disgust. Maybe I should burst write for a while and see if that solves the problem.

On a different note: I looooove TV-series. They give the creators a great opportunity for nuance. You never have the same chance in a movie to slowly see a character develop. And seeing it happen slowly just adds so much more to the experience. And I really wonder how the hell David E. Kelley managed to write scripts for two shows simultaneously. He wrote Ally McBeal and The Practice, which are one-hour drama shows, himself. All the episodes. I've never seen The Practice but judging from Ally McBeal he really knows his stuff. Guys like him make me want to become a mad scientist and build a Brain Sucking Device(tm). Or maybe become a zombie...

I'll write some more, 'cause -- swimming, remember? I'm gonna go see Harry Potter and the gobbled fire tonight, which will be interesting. The other two movies (there are three, but I have yet to see number two) were quite entertaining, and from reviews I'm guessing this one won't disappoint either. I'm really curious though, who is going to eat the fire? And why? And what does that have to do with Lord Walmart? Is Walmart going to eat the fire? And what's the connection between Lord Walmart and the Walmart chain store? And will the vibrating broomstick (try google) be featured this time? I'm looking forward to having my questions answered later tonight.

Latex is out! Styrofoam is in!

2005-11-10T11:32:00.000+01:00

Styrofoam underwear is the latest thing in the fashion world today... or I wish it were, but they have a tendency to fall apart when you move around. As soon as I find a way around that problem (I need bark from a cactus), you'll all be wearing my styrofoam underwear (well, not the ones I'm wearing right now, but you know what I mean) before you know it!
Imagine, you're outside when you spot that special someone who you've longed to ask out on a date, but it's a cold night and you're starting to freeze. And when you finally gather the courage to ask, you just stutter something, laugh feebly and go home to cry in your bed and hug your cactus. Do you recognize yourself?
If you've had styrofoam underwear the situation would have been quite different (you would've experienced first-hand how it feels to be dumped because of your underwear). I expect you to buy at least to pair after I've worked out the kinks.

On a more serious (did I say serious? I meant geeky) note: the Buffy/Angel-universe will continue to exist in a another medium. There has been some Spike comics which I haven't read (because this is Sweden and we don't use paper anymore, we use bark, but not from cactus) and now there will be a Buffy/Angel-comic. The difference is that this comic will be written by the creator of the two series: Joss Whedon. You can read more about it here.
Now we might finally get to see who the Immortal is. I actually found that episode (The girl in question from Angel season 5) quite funny, which I understand not everybody did.

I tried to keep this short and sweet, just like me, except for the short part. 'Cause I give sweet pillow-talk! Just ask my pillow.

P.S: I will try to write more often (does this trick still work?) because it jolly fun! ... and deliberating, which might not be such a good thing... for you anyway.

Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning

2005-10-30T18:27:00.000+01:00

Star Trek has been in circulation for nearly forty years. And then Babylon 5 stepped up to compete. I've seen both of them and I like them. But... what about a cross-over to really see which one is the best?
J. Michael Straczynski had this to say about it: "... over my cold, dead body."
He also said the only way that could happen would be through some kind of time travel/alternate timeline story. Good idea!
So, take some vulcan ears, a klingon forehead, a vorlon, an alcoholic security chief and a finnish speaking crew and you'll get: Star Wreck
Yes, it's in finnish.
But it's subtitled (or else I wouldn't be writing about it here). I've seen my fair share of fan-made films and this is the best I've seen thus far. It's incredibly ambitious and it works. The movie is hilarious and it's an incredible accomplishment considering what resources the film makers had. Most of it is blue-screened, but most of the space battles looks like a million bucks (in a budgetery sense) .

So, shoo! Go away, run out and download it, it's free. Show it to your friends! Show it to your pets!
Lock on! Fire lightballs!

"Colossal" things are coming...

2005-10-14T22:57:00.000+02:00

Do you see the world as a dull place? Nothing exciting ever happens. Always the same news on the same TV-screen and talking to the same friends about the same subjects. And for some arcane reason, H.P. Lovecraft's writings have still yet not come true. Or have they? Giant fossil found in India. Could this be... it might actually be... yes, it must be!
Behold, Cthulu and Shub-niggurath are finally arriving! *chant* *chant*

Shut up! Stop chanting! Yes, I'm talking to you. No, not you. Yes, you, with the hood and the "Death rules your ass!" T-shirt. You really shouldn't wear that in public -- we don't want to read that and I bet Death would have a thing or two to say about your taste in clothes.

Listen... do you hear that?
That, is Mr Lovecraft, turning like a washing machine in his grave.

When you have stared yourself blind at that footage, you might want to take a look at this for more commercial fun.

What it's not about

2005-09-28T00:59:00.000+02:00

So, today I will tell you what this is not about and what I won't do (unless I change my mind, which has happened a number of times... like three or something). What is this post not about? It's not about a lot of things. It's not about childcare or rocketships (although rocketships are cool, don't get me wrong; childcare does not go well with rocketships which is a shame). It's not about sex (which can lead to childcare). It's not about learning to speak a foreign language (which might be useful depending on where you live). It's almost not about movies and it's almost not about me.

No, wait, I gotta be here somewhere? Everything here is about ME! I like me. Me is good. Me is intelligent and good looking. At least according to my world. Ever heard of planet Crypton? I'm from the neighbouring planet: planet Squishy. Everyone there except me are made of green slime (I strongly suspect I was adopted). Sometimes on my planet we... you're not buying this, are you?
Darn. Anyway, the reason I came here is because I haven't written anything here in a long bad while. I say bad because it's bad when I don't write so that I can't give you the chance to not read what I write.

Got that?

The reason for the not-about-ed-ness is my decision not to review movies here. I've been thinking to and fro about it and decided not to. I'll talk about movies I've seen or I'm going to see from time to time, but no straight I-giveth-this-movie-three-and-two-thirds-of-a-half-of-a-"jolly-good" reviews.

Talking about movies, I'm eagerly awaiting Serenity by Joss Whedon, based on the Firefly TV-series. The series haven't been shown on TV in Sweden but the movie will premiere here in november. I own the Firefly DVD-boxset (I'm such a geek) and it's a good show, sadly they cancelled it midseason. If you want to know more about the story of Firefly and it's rise to big screen, just do a google: "I'm feeling lucky" for firefly.

Bloody hell! When I start writing here there's nothing stopping me. Except for maybe a power outage, or a nymphomaniac man-deprived female supermodel. I've suffered multiple power outages and still, I haven't seen even a tiny piece of that supermodel. Well, actually, I'm happy that I haven't found a piece of her, that would be disgusting in a gore-is-ok-in-movies-but-so-not-ok-in-real-life-kind of way.
Based on this empiric observation I conclude that probability mathematics are rubbish.

See how I began this in a completely different way then how I ended it? That's consistency for ya! A clouded mind creates confusing text (I heard that line was going to be in Starwars 7). Now, that's all for me for tonight... I can't stop typing! Help! Somebody, help me! HELP! ANYBODY!?

I'm still here. Maybe some random female supermodel could help me out of this predicament?
Hello?
Damn, it didn't work this time either. Well, this is too long and disarrayed already and I need my beautysleep (like it helps). So, good night or good morning or good afternoon or whatever.

Why write?

2005-07-30T04:27:00.000+02:00

I felt like writing something which at least had a remote possibility of being read by someone. So, I pondered the subject and in a stroke of genius I decided that this blog-entry should be about blog-entries and the why behind them. That means this entry will be self-referential and full of itself, consider yourself warned.

For the sake of my self-indulgence, let's ignore the fact that this page is not among the 8058044651 pages that Google examine. It is not being linked to by any other pages (except for a forum I frequent where I have this page in my signature). It's not likely that someone will type in this url by chance, unless it's a monkey (obscure reference) and in that case it will just trash my comments section. The page hasn't had that many visitors (22 to be exact) and I often write in a preachy, know-it-all kinda way. I call it catchy, informative, writing with a twist (best served while heavily intoxicated).

I have a few comments on some of my posts and those came by when I had an egomaniacal fit and forced my friends to comment on some of the stuff I'd written, so that I can pretend to have an audience while I'm playing with my dolls (I don't play with dolls, they're called "Action Figures").

I actually don't have any kind of audience, at least not one which is here by their own free will. With this dismal amount of visitors, why do I keep writing? I like to write. It's yet another way to communicate. And it's more expressive than, say, smoke signals or morse code. Or no, it's not, it's just as expressive -- and faster. Having an audience, even a small audience of maybe two or three people would be interesting if there would be some kind of dialogue. But since I tend to write longish entries about whatever I happen to pull out of my Bag o'Subjets that day, I think I confuse people.
What is this blog about? It's about me. It's about me and what I think about things that I find interesting.

I've looked at a number of blogs and many of them only contain information about what the author has done during a day. It's often written like a summary for a movie but with all the boring details left in. Example:

I woke up when Dorothy started singing about rainbows. It was raining
outside. I walked Toto, our dog. When I came in she wanted me to buy groceries. I went to the store and bought milk, two loafs of bread, butter and a pair of ruby shoes for Dorothy. After that I went to my workshop and worked for four hours. Then I got bored and went to bed and slept for two hours.
I dreamt about winged monkeys.
Dorothy woke me up and thanked me for the shoes. We ate dinner and went to bed again.

What is important and interesting about what happens to people is what the person thought at that moment and what the person thinks about it in retrospect. The event itself is often uninteresting unless it's something really strange like UFO's, flying monkeys or world peace.
Imagine a movie without a main character. We just see people go about their daily business. It would be boring and it would be pointless, much like some of the blogs out there. I hope what I write isn't pointless or boring, and I can understand if someone thinks this is pretentions bullshit, who knows, you might be right. But it's me and I like to write, and I have a tendency to write too much even though I try, I really do, to keep it as short as possible.

Be deep, be thoughtful, be tolerant, Be Cool, because sometimes the writer can't find a fourth wall.

You blew me up you bastard!

2005-07-18T17:13:00.000+02:00

This was really funny in a sick way: You blew me up you bastard

Where can I buy stamps for my emails?

2005-06-11T19:35:00.000+02:00

This link: http://shirky.com is interesting. Clan Shirky has written a number of articles concerning internet, P2P, the future of media and other things not related to lost stamp collections. Check it out if you're fascinated by stuff like this (which I am.) And stay away if you can't find your stamp collection.

Give a man a fish...

2005-06-08T09:56:00.000+02:00

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." A chinese proverb.
Now, not that many people in the western world fish for food nowdays, so maybe this is more appropriate: "Give a man a big mac and you feed him for a day. Get a man a job at McDonalds and he will smell of burger grease for a lifetime."
Or, if we're talking about the internet, one could probably say "Give a man a link and you shut him up for a day. Teach a man to Google and you shut him up permanently."

I read somewhere that a person decides whether a page is interesting or not in ten seconds. If you're seeing a movie, can you decide if it's worth watching after ten seconds? If you're reading a book, can you say if it's any good after ten seconds? Hopefully not (or maybe you accidentally got a hold of the phone book.)
When it comes to computers and looking for information, people say "This is a computer, it is fast, it is cool, and it shall do my bidding! This, that which they call the Inter Net, holds the answers." After a few hours - having barely avoided a dozen porn pages, having read about a hidden alien base inside the Niagara Falls and having called the airline to cancel that vacation to Canada - all you can hear is mumbling about how you can fit so much crap in such a tiny box. Then, they go to their favorite forum and ask. Having fought and lost a battle with a search engine, they don't try the search function in the forum. Thus, they add their own pile of crap to the global lavatory of the future.

So, I guess what I want to say is this, "Patience, grasshopper, and Just Fucking Google It!"

And remember, the Google knows...

How internet affects media

2005-05-26T21:36:00.000+02:00

This article: Piracy is Good? by Mark Pesce, contains some interesting thoughts about piracy, mainly concerning TV-shows. I don't agree to everything he says, but he has a very active brain (I suspect it having time-traveling properties.)
Some of the ways movies, TV-shows, music and computer games are distributed today won't work "The day after tomorrow". Because then the world will be covered in ice, while the dangers of global warming is forced upon us by guys resembling Dennis Quaid. No, wait, I got sidetracked.
A lot of people have realized that you cannot really stop piracy, and some haven't. Trying to shut down people for downloading movies won't work. And shutting down torrent-sites and DirectConnect hubs is only a temporary solution.

I understand how the artists and the companies feel, and I wouldn't want to be in their shoes, partially because being artistic and a business man at the same time seems terribly confusing.
The way they're trying to legislate away the problem won't work either, because then you are not listening to both sides. People want to download their movies and their music and their games, and since there is currently no technical way to stop people from doing it, they will continue doing what they consider to be their right.
Force persuading people to stop downloading might work, but it would have to be handled delicately, preferebly through a secret cult. I will investigate the possibilities for this as soon as I find my magickal meeting stick.

Pesce's idea about inserting intrusive commercials in TV-shows and then letting people download them for free on the internet is viable. The ads mustn't be too big or too annoying or it won't work, just a small logo or a scrolling line of text, popping up now and then. Or, come to think of it, subliminal messages. If you used subliminal ads, the viewers won't complain that it destroys the viewing experience. Hmm. They might be confused as to why they get the urge to eat a happy-meal after watching a fitness show though. Anyway.

Computer games could also more funding from selling ads then they do today, but it's just a matter of time before we get "*sigh* After killing all those ugly, evil looking, Lord of the Rings-wannabe trolls, I drink some of this magic CocaCola-potion to regain my health."

Pesce also predicts this will seriously reduce broadcast TV and DVD sales. I don't think that's the case. The internet will probably work more as an alternative to the regular distribution channels. No, it already is an alternative. As I'm sure you know, you can find anything on the internet. The companies just need to embrace it.

Not entirely related: World of Ends popped to mind when I was writing this article. It's an interesting read, and I find it somehow... poetical.

"Malcom Reynolds could SO kick Han Solo's ass!"

2005-05-17T22:14:00.000+02:00

I think the very first "fantasy in space"-movie I saw was Star Wars. I don't remember exactly how old I was but I remember thinking they were absolutly fantastic, and for a few years they were the best movies I'd ever seen - little did I know there are different kinds of "best."
A few years after Star Wars I got more interested in movies which led to more movie-watching (and now it's reached the "Hello, my name is Richard, and I'm an addict"-stage.) The more movies I saw, the more I realized you can't really put all movies into the same ranking system. You could rank movies within their genre but that would leave too much information out. Because then you would get Star Wars, Star Trek and Alien in the same category and they are very different kinds of movies and, I think, have partially different audiences.
Star Wars is aiming for adventure, classic heroes and classic bad guys (Darth Vader being one of the coolest ever) and I think it hits its target.
Alien is horror, also hitting its target. Aliens is panic and Alien 3 is about shaved heads, dirty prisoners and dogs in space.
Star Trek is pseudo-science, technobabble-orgies and sometimes a sociological analysis.

So, if people realized that all movies don't fit into the same ladder, I think they could have more civilized conversation about movies without it turning into "Kirk would snatch Leia from Han Solo in a heart beat!"
Maybe people have already realized this and they just go about flaming anyway - a "the curse of the internet" kind of deal? Or maybe this isn't the problem, maybe it's something else. Feel free to comment.

This blog entry began as a discussion about Star Wars and ended up in an attempt by me, to describe why people argue about movies. Now, the link I had prepared really doesn't fit with the what I wrote, but here it is anyway http://www.pvponline.com/archive.php3?archive=20050510

"Real Life" postponed

2005-05-13T20:57:00.000+02:00

When you have spent a number of years with little money, lots of micro-food and a bunch of late nights studying for exams; there will actually come a day when you graduate.
Now it's time to go out into reality. You have hopefully learnt what you need to get by on your own. Time to shape your life into what it was meant to be. Now, that's a hard thing to do - shaping your life, your future, because failing in this matter can be really disappointing and potentially scarring.

The guy in this article: http://www.madison.com/wsj/home/local/index.php?ntid=35174&ntpid=1 has decided to put "real life" on hold for a while, by not graduating.
Weird choice? Maybe, but I understand him. Not that I would want to go on studying for that many years. If I had to, I would probably go not a little nuts and leave massacred thoughts and creepy blog entries, professing Malcom McDowell the evil ruler of my imaginary island, in my wake.
Anyway, it's an interesting article.

Doom comic

2005-05-11T09:06:00.000+02:00

http://www.doomworld.com/10years/doomcomic/comic.php

I found this comic based on id Software's game Doom, a bit amuzing. It's written bad intentionally to capture that b-movie feel. Odds are a movie based on Doom would end up similar to this. Well, maybe not this bad, but certainly closer to this than Terminator 2 or some other good action movie.